STOP! Not GO! Well, thank you officer/bobby/cop on a bike.
And, thanks for the £30 ticket, I might add.
I tell ya folks, London has got it in for me. In my defense, I'd never biked on this busy street. I say busy because the red light that I didn't see was not a cross street for cars but one of the million pedestrian crossings found all over London. And, there people crossing, people who saw me trying to make this turn and had paused to let me through...
My bad. But, jeez, when this cop came up besides me and yelled something in cockney, london-ize which I don't and won't speak, I said "What?!" maybe I was a little bit curt.
"I said, pull over mate!" (no, you didn't, you said something like hey there or you alright or some such crap English)
Side-note: My first reaction comes from the fact that two days ago, a woman came up to me while I was stopped at a red light, see I obey the rules of the road. Anyway, this lady started screaming "Fucking sod, fucking on a bike, fuck!" She was obviously a bit deranged but so could this psycho in a neon jumper, I don't know!
So, I got a ticket. The dude was literally salivating and shaking and really got into telling me about how I could've killed his child, how irresponsible I am and how this week's its "0 tolerance." I was on a bike, man, going REALLY slow with a heavy trailer, but maybe if the kid had fallen on the ground right as I made my turn I could've done some damage. Sorry.
Hey, we all got a job to do, I understand that. Personally, I've never understood the weird power trip that motivates some people to go into the police force, but you better believe this guy loved that part of his job. He threatened to arrest me if he couldn't verify that I gave him the right address. Yikes.
And, as he kept me there for like 45 minutes, the weirdest thing happened, he looked at me and asked me how I would describe my ethnic origin. I said "White, um, obviously?" He said that it didn't matter, he was forced to ask me and he seemed a bit satisfied with himself as he made a note of this on his pad.
Now, I'm not saying that this white cop targeted me because I'm white or that I was wearing a Yankees hat (which lead to the standard, 'Oh you're from NY, Mets or Yankees fan?'). But, I would say that instead of letting me off with a warning that would have been just as effective, he wanted to screw me and my white Yankee self with a ticket. Maybe to meet a quota, get a promotion, who knows?
All I know is that this represents the second fine I've gotten here in less than a month. Both fines were simple errors, not the least bit malicious, not destroying the environment, threatening any one's health or safety, or hurting the English way of life as far as I can tell. They were what we like to call mistakes. And, to make a completely irrational guess I would say that there's this weird "You should know better, whitey" thing that goes on around here.
Cause we all know how much the British love their rules, and you'd better not even think about breaking those rules, especially if you speak fluent English and are a Mets fan.
